Monday, July 28, 2008

passion

i sat on the Amtrak bus headed to S.L.O., it was late and Josie was snuggling in close covered by her "dede"(blanket). i held her and listened to the conversations happening between passengers around me. i couldn't help myself, one 22 yr old girl struck up a conversation with the guy across from her. At first she asked the surface questions, but quickly she changed gears and asked what he thought about God. She was ready to evangelize. The guy responded that he had just become a Christian 6 months ago at a Taco Loco. They shared their testimonies- she was just returning from a Hillsong conference in Australia, and knew that God was calling her to work with children who are being prostituted in the states. He was in his early 20's, has a 3 yr old daughter, and was into drugs, when someone approached him at a Taco Loco and spoke right to his heart. Now he is a youth group leader at a church, getting involved in worship, and he is in love with Jesus.
They are both in love with Jesus. As they spoke i could hear the romance, wonder, hope, and knowing that comes from being in love with Jesus. And i missed a girl i used to know. A girl who would have boarded that bus knowing there was love to be spilled. And it spilled, because she was so full of that love it had to spill.

i missed a girl who use to pray and know it would be answered. i do not pray like that anymore.
A girl who use to fight for what she knew God was calling her to. i do not fight or listen to His calling like that anymore.
She use to spill with love for Jesus, couldn't help it. i don't spill like that anymore.

i know that i am 34, and a 20 yr old Christian. i know that what Jesus and i have now is lasting, faithful, sure, and like a marriage our relationship becomes more beautiful with time.

But i miss that girl.

8 comments:

  1. This
    is
    beautiful.

    I have a girl I miss too.

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  2. That is so beautiful that he was changed like that and now he's walking with Christ and making a different. Wonderful!

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  3. What a wonderful conversation to stumble upon. How wonderful to hear how God changed their lives! Hmmm...I wonder what will happen with that relationship?? I didn't know the girl you used to be, but I read about the woman you are now & I have to say that your heart, love, & passion for the Lord are very evident...He shines brightly in you and don't ever forget the woman He's refined & molded you to be now.

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  4. Love the story of the girl and guy on the train - how cool to observe that interaction!

    I was so in tears reading this Denise. Beautiful. I have a girl that I miss too. Sometimes I get glimpses of her but then poof she is gone again. How can I get her to stay?

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  5. I miss a young girl I used to know. Sometimes I pray to meet her again and then I remember that God answered prayers by turning her to someone else. Sometimes I forget that that was His plan from the beginning and who am I to argue? He makes all things new.... and He has given you an opportunity to begin praying for the growth of 2 new believers. What a gift! Thanks for sharing.

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  6. I love reading your blogspot Denise. It stirs my mind and heart. I see your passion for life, for Christ, and for truth in your words.

    I see a woman who knows Jesus and has known him for a long time (wow 20 years – you’re old!)

    I see a woman who shares Christ with us and with her children. This woman will always be the girl she was when she first fell in love with Jesus but now she is oh so much more. She knows that Christ is in it for the long haul. That God’s promises are true. That at the end of the race God will say, “Well done my beloved child”. Her faith is not on the tip of her heart but consumes her heart. If anyone can be both the passionate girl and the woman of faith – you are she.

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  7. Wow. I just needed to hear this right now. I always love hearing your thoughts on your blog. I have a girl that I miss, too, and I sometimes get a glimpse of her. I wish she would stay.

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  8. I am 37, Denise, and I think we could have a great conversation right now.
    I know just what you mean.

    If only it wasn't 2 am and we weren't a continent apart. :)

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